Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Sad day

Dear Hadlee,

Today was hard, I hated today, I hated the fact that I couldn't see you when you woke up for your nap or I couldn't put you down, I hated that I wasn't there to comfort you when you got hurt. As I walked out the door I could hear you screaming for me, I waned to run back in and grab you.I thought about you all day, I long for the day that I will get to stay at home with you again and we can play all day. As I pulled away from the baby sitters house I said a pray with tears rolling down my face. Am I a bad mother? Should I be doing this? I Prayed that you would understand one day and that I could understand as well that this will be worth it and I am helping our little family for a better future and to make it so I will be able to stay home with you after your dad gets done with school and starts his career. I am so grateful for this job I found. I know heavenly father blessed me to find it, its just hard to leave you. I prayed that you will be taken care of and that you will forgive me for leaving you. I love you Hadlee, I love every minute I get to spend with you. I can't wait for the day I get to be there to eat lunch with you, or to watch our shows, or when you get home from school!
I love you Hadlee Starr!

1 comment:

  1. You just made me cry! I remember leaving Audrey at the sitters and thinking the exact same things! I don't remember how many weeks I cried on my drive to work. It was the worst. And now, even after some tough days, you helped remind me just how blessed I am. So thank you.

    It's awful to leave our babies!! But looking back, it really was all worth it. And it is just a short amount of time before you get to be with her all the time!! Good luck!